Welcome to this week’s edition of the Five Minute Friday link-up! Each week we gather around a single word prompt and freewrite for five minutes flat. Some of us choose to share our work, others choose to keep it to ourselves. Either way, you’re invited to read the posts linked at the bottom of this page and spread some love to your fellow writers!
If you’re new to the link-up, you can learn more about it here.
This week’s FMF writing prompt is: BLAME
Setting my timer for five minutes, and . . . GO.Â
I have an aversion to being blamed. I think it traces back to Adam and Eve. In the Garden of Eden, after they had sinned, first Adam blamed Eve, then Eve blamed the serpent (Genesis 3:12-13).
But more than a sinful nature tendency to want to blame others, I am supremely averse to being the cause of the blame. As I type this, I think this character trait of mine is linked to my “people pleasing” problem.
I want people to be happy with me and not upset with me, so I don’t want to give them a reason to blame me for anything.
About a month ago, our basement flooded. It was related to a frozen pipe that got opened too soon before it had fully thawed, and the cleanup is still in process. My husband and I spent more than eight hours one day moving furniture, books, desks, rugs, etc. out of the affected rooms, vacuuming up water, resetting fans and dehumidifiers.
It was a big mess and a lot of work, and the whole time I just kept thinking I was so glad I wasn’t to blame. I didn’t even care whose fault it was, as long as it wasn’t mine. I would’ve felt terrible if I had caused that much work, time, and money to be spent on my error, however unintentional it may have been.
So. Any therapists out there? 😉 Who can help me figure out why I care so much about the possibility of being blamed? 😉
And . . . time’s up. I guess we shall leave the matter unresolved for today.
+++
In case you missed it . . .
BOTH of my new books are now available in-store and online!
CLICK HERE FOR LINKS TO PURCHASE
Letters to Grief
and
101 Prayers for Comfort in Difficult Times
I hope they’re both a blessing to you!
+++
Join the link-up with your own five-minute freewrite on the prompt, BLAME, then visit your link-up neighbor to read their post and leave an encouraging comment:Â
This week a young man killed himself,
which really is a shame,
and I’ve been looking through the shelf
to try to find some blame.
Perhaps it’s social media,
or bullies uncorrected;
it’s an encyclopedia,
how one can feel rejected,
but maybe we should look within,
at expectations that we set.
We call comparison a sin,
but we’ve not forsworn it yet,
and we leave no-where to hide
from our deadly social pride.
Three minutes and change, written from a heart of sorrow.
Oh, so tragic, Andrew! I’m so sorry. How devastating.
It was so unexpected, Kate. It happened just yesterday, and the boy’s sole communication was that he thought he’d never fit in.
It’s so easy to fix blame and go on… mental health or lax disciplining of bullies or drugs or the wrong diet…
But I think it’s really us, with tolerance of and implicit approval for social standards that celebrate lifestyle and mores that can never be anything but fraudulent, a lethal chimera that lures to the abyss.
Help is available; the Suicide And Crisis Lifeline is open 24/7, call or text 988.
And if anyone reading this is considering suicide, or knows someone who is, call now.
Because sometimes, tomorrow never comes.
Hi Kate -I always submit my post before reading any others, I want to write what comes to mind without being influenced. I am always surprised how many people tend to have the same kinds of thoughts! I think blame and shame are so closely tied. You talked about the garden of Eden, like I did. And Adam and Eve first felt shame and then they blamed. I think that might we why we have so much trouble with “fear of blame” I am challenged by same thoughts as you “at least Im not to blame” or I spend time wondering if I am too blame. and if I feel like I might be to blame I notice myself wanting to pass that blame along, like Adam did to Eve! We are humans ,all heirs of the human condition! Im thankful for grace and the ability to see ourselves as God sees us as He encourages to always be growing even as we are fully loved just as we are! FMF #18
Hi Kate. Thank you for all that you do.
Your post here strikes a chord with me very much in a personal way. I don’t think I’d ever put that into words.
In my case I think it is a hyper-vigilance to avoid punishments which frequently came my way as a child.
My thoughts on the prompt word followed a similar path.